Jungle Boogie
by PenguinDynasty
Summary: Skate. It is set after What Kate Did. Kate hears one of Sawyer's feverish confessions and it changes everything.
1. Chapter 1

Kate was sitting on the beach looking out at the water. The sun was beginning to set and it case an orange glow over her. Sawyer went over to her, hobbling a bit. Without a word she looked up at him and then back down. He handed her a liquor bottle and then sat down with a groan.

She took the bottle and downed it, still silently.

"Cat got your tongue?"

Kate looked at him with a hard indifference before turning back to look.

"Okay apparently I did something. But ain't that always the case." Sawyer smirked and took a drink.

"It's not you." Kate said with out looking at him.

"Well that's something. So what is it?"

Kate looked at him and then back again. "You don't want to know. It doesn't matter"

"I'm a curious guy sweetheart. But not enough to beg." He started to stand up, annoyed with her, but he wasn't about to stay and let her find out that she could get to him.

"I kissed Jack." She blurted out, her eyes widening, though she still looked straight ahead.

Sawyer sat back down. "You did wha-" He caught him self, though not quick enough to keep Kate from grinning just a little. "Oh."

"Is that jealousy?" Kate couldn't help but smile.

"I know you have a thing for the good doctor. Doesn't matter to me, there are plenty of other girls on this island."

Kate's smile faded and she looked back out at the ocean, she reached and took Sawyer's bottle from him and drank some of it before handing it back.

Now it was Sawyer's turn to grin. "Seems like you're the jealous one."

Kate glared at him, annoyed and just a little hurt. After all she had watched over him while he was sick. "It didn't mean anything, I thought it would but it didn't."

Sawyer raised an eyebrow, trying to find meaning in her words. "What?"

"When I kissed Jack. It was while you were sick." She was talking quickly now, as if she was scared to say this. "And you know…I thought that maybe if I kissed him it would mean something, but it didn't. I mean it was nice and all…but there was nothing. At least not for me."

"Why are you telling me this?" Sawyer asked. He was surprised to see that she looked almost ready to cry when he looked at her. At least he assumed that's what the look was; he had never seen her cry. But he was pretty sure there was sadness.

"Because…" A chill went through her and she wrapped her arms around herself.

"Here." Sawyer took of his shirt in a moment of chivalry and gave it to her.

Kate looked at him and smiled. "Thanks."

"You never answered my question."

Kate frowned a bit and made to get up. Sawyer grabbed her wrist.

Kate looked at him and smiled. "Thanks."

"You never answered my question."

Kate frowned a bit and made to get up. Sawyer grabbed her wrist.

"Because you're the reason it didn't mean anything okay?" She pulled her arm free easily and walked off quickly, knowing that in his condition he wouldn't be able to keep up.

Kate headed towards the hatch. Her thoughts were chiding her. _Why'd you go and tell him. Good job. Really great Kate. _

Her thoughts were interrupted by the snap of a branch. She turned around and saw Jack and her heart sank. He had a suitcase in his hands. He lowered his eyes a bit when she looked at him.

"It's Shannon's things. I'm not sure what to do with it." Jack looked at her oddly, and Kate realized she still had on Sawyer's shirt. "You shouldn't be out here, it's late."

"I'm am big girl. Want me to help you with that?"

"No I've got it." Jack continued to walk. "How's he doing?"

"I'm doing great actually, nice of you to think of me doc." Sawyer came up behind them.

Kate could have kicked herself for going slow enough for him to catch up and especially stopping when she saw Jack. She looked at Sawyer hoping he wouldn't do anything.

"You shouldn't be going around without a shirt, you don't need a cold on top of everything else."

"Gave it to Freckles. She has _feelings _for me you see." Sawyer smirked, all to happy to irritate Jack.

"Stop it okay!" Kate yelled causing both men to look at her. "You don't need to do this." She turned to Jack. "I'm sorry okay. I really am, you're a great guy and I'm sorry."

Jack stared at her in silence, and then she took off running. Jack turned to Sawyer.

"I can't run, if you want to be heroic and go after her be my guest." Sawyer continued walking towards the hatch.

"She's probably heading to the hatch." Jack said coldly. "I think I'll go back to the beach."

Sawyer looked at him and kept walking. Kate was probably pissed at him but she'd get over it. She was probably madder at herself anyways.

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He found her on the top bunk of where he had been sleeping. She was sitting down and her legs were dangling of the side. "Aren't you cute." He said climbing up to sit by her. "I thought maybe we should talk." He laughed a bit. "Plus it's warmer in here."

Kate looked at him. He was right she was mad. "Why'd you do that?" She asked.

"To get a rise out of Jack. Look Sassafras, I'm not no gentleman, and I'm sure as hell not Prince Charming, so if you expect me to turn into one just because you have feelings for me your wrong."

"That's not what I was expecting. If anything I was expecting you to maybe feel the same way."

"Well it's hard to tell you anything when you take off running." He looked at her. He wasn't about to tell her that he really did have 'feelings' for her, but maybe he could offer her something. "I came after you didn't I?"

Kate looked at him and smiled. She was really cute when she smiled. "And you were an ass doing it."

Sawyer grinned proudly his dimples showing. "Didn't want to let you down."

Kate bit her lip and grinned, shaking her head. "I'm tired. Are you staying here?"

"Probably, I'm to lazy to go back. You?"

"I have to, me and Charlie are taking care of the button of doom." Kate was silent for at least a full 15 seconds before quietly adding in, using her best I-just-want-to-be-nice voice very unconvincingly. "Well um…there's only two beds…so you can sleep up here with me if you'd like."

Sawyer grinned at her, and being the jerk he was said, "Naw, I'll take the couch. Sweet dreams Freckles." And jumping off the bed he headed off.

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Charlie woke Kate up at three. "Sorry, but its' your turn, I tried to let you sleep but I'm about to fall asleep myself."

Kate smiled at him. "It's fine. See you in the morning Charlie." She headed off to the kitchen. _Coffee, for the love of God please let there still be coffee. _Luckily there was. Kate made it as quietly as she could trying not to disturb Sawyer who looked peaceful sleeping.

He would just have to go to sleep on the couch so she had to be super quiet, she thought. He started moving a bit more.

"No. She ain't done nothing man. Leave her alone." Sawyer said twisting on the couch. At first Kate thought he had woken up but she then saw he was having a nightmare.

"Sawyer?" She whispered setting her coffee down and going towards him. She sat down on the table across from the couch and smoothed his hair. "It's okay."

"No! Let me go! I got to save her! I don't care if it kills me." Sawyer sounded helpless. Kate wondered whom he was talking about. Who would he care about enough to risk his own life for? He was silent for a while but Kate kept sitting there.

The alarm sounded and Kate quickly went and typed in the numbers and headed back. He was talking again when she got back.

"No! I love her! I don't care who she killed." He looked almost feral in his helplessness.

Kate quickly sat down again. "Sawyer, it's okay it's me Kate." She put her hand on his head. He was hot. Jack had told her he might get like this. He still had the infection. He shouldn't have been running all over the island.

Sawyer twisted. "I'll kill him. I'll fcking kill him."

"Sawyer I'm here. It's Kate. You're going to be fine. I promise."

He calmed a bit. "Kate?" His breathing was ragged and heavy.

"Yeah. It's me. You're okay." She smiled a bit, glad that he was calming down.

"You're not dead." He had opened his eyes a bit but seemed unaware that he wasn't still dreaming. "Or are you a ghost."

"No I'm fine. I'm not dead." Was she the one he was talking about in his dream? No, of course not. He didn't love her; it must be some dream girl. He had told her he never loved anyone.

Sawyer smiled. "You're alive. I was scared. I won't let them take you again. Okay? You believe me right?

"Of course I do. Now go back to sleep."

"Okay. I love you." He turned over and closed his eyes. Kate sat there stunned. His breathing slowed down but she still sat there. _He couldn't have thought he was talking to her. But then he said Kate. Well he's delusional._

Kate played it over and over in her head all night. Was he talking about her? She really wished that she knew, but she couldn't ask him when he woke up. He'd just deny it even if it were true.

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Kate headed straight to the garden as soon as she got the chance. She didn't even wait for Sawyer to wake up. They had been saving seeds from the things they ate and she planned on planting them.

"How're you?" Sun asked coming up beside her. "You look tired."

"It was my night in the Hatch." Kate said digging with more effort than was required.

"Are you okay?" Sun asked sounding genuinely concerned.

Kate wasn't use to people actually caring about how she felt. The sincerity of Sun's voice caught her off guard and with only a little more persuasion she found herself telling the whole story to her.

"The first time I ever saw Jin I was going to eat at a hotel with another man, our parents had set us up. In fact I thought he was going to purpose to me that day, but instead he broke it off. It hurt…but I met Jin."

Kate nodded. She didn't know where Sun was going with this.

"You can't chose who you love. And sometimes you hurt people that you care about in the process. And all you can really do is apologize to those people, because your heart won't listen to your brain."

Kate smiled at Sun and she smiled back. "I just wish Sawyer was….just more caring."

Sun helped Kate dig. "But you still care for him. I was planning on leaving Jin when we got to America. And now I don't know what I'd do without him. Nothing changed expect I understood."

"You are an angel." Kate said looking at Sun admiringly.

Sun laughed. "No I'm not. I was going to leave my husband."

Kate shook her head. "You are the most caring person I have ever met. And thanks really."

Sun smiled at her more. "That's what friends are for, right?"

Friend. Kate hadn't had a friend since she was little. "Yeah, you're right."


	2. Chapter 2

"For the love of God quit being a baby and hold still." Kate tried yet again to clean out Sawyer's arm. 

"It hurts." Sawyer growled. He was looking at her with a feral look. She supposed it was meant to be fierce but the effect was lost due to the fact he was holding his arm and whining like a child.

"James!" Kate tried it out with a smirk.

"Don't call me that." He turned his arm away from her.

"I'm not going to stop calling you that until you let me clean and re-bandage your arm. Some con you are." Kate grabbed his arm.

Reluctantly Sawyer obliged, complaining the whole time

Kate finished up with a look of triumph. "That wasn't so bad was it? Do you want a lollipop?"

"Excuse me for complaining about the whole gunshot wound in my arm!"

"You're welcome." Kate said standing up and throwing a pillow at him. She turned around and started to walk away but suddenly felt herself being knocked to the ground.

Sawyer had her pinned down, and he was grinning triumphantly. Kate could have easily gotten up, he was really only using one arm but she couldn't say she really minded the situation.

"You mind?" She asked looking up at him.

"Not at all Sweetcheeks." His dimples were showing.

"You still need a haircut." Kate stated, he was looking down at her and she could barely see his face.

Sawyer let go of her and sat back on the floor. "I'll do it myself."

Kate sat up. "You'll mess it up."

"I've cut my hair before."

"That doesn't mean it looked good. And when's the last time you cut your hair with only one arm?" Kate went and got the scissors.

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Kate decided the best place to cut his hair would be outside; she chose a spot right where the dirt met the sand and brought out a chair. She brushed his hair down and stood back making sure it was all flat. "Hold still."

Sawyer shook his head like a wet dog causing his hair to fly everywhere, and it once again looked like it had been attacked my a lawn mower.

Kate hit the back of his head. "Would you stop?" She said brushing his hair again. "Now don't move." She prayed he wouldn't move.

Sawyer didn't. He was blowing on a piece of stray hair seeing how long he could get it to stay up. "Ouch!" He yelled, jerking as Kate brushed out a knot.

"Sorry." She muttered smiling and not sounding at all apologetic. She started cutting his hair in silence.

"I'm bored." Sawyer turned to look at her just as she was about to cut.

Kate sighed exasperated. "This would go a lot faster if you would just hold still."

Sawyer put his head back where it was; he was clearly amused by the fact that he had her so annoyed. He decided to stay still for a while however. He didn't want her cutting off his ear.

"You have really bad split ends." Kate commented.

"Sorry there wasn't a lot of conditioner, in the middle of the jungle, we had some on the raft, you know the necessities but the shark took it. He said his wife had sent him out for some."

"I was just trying to make small talk."

"Oh." Sawyer was silent for a while. He seemed to be thinking, every once in a while a smirk would appear on his face. He waited until Kate moved to the side of his head to cut before he said anything again. Looking over and her he smiled, attempting to look as sincere as possible. "Nice shirt."

Kate stopped mid cut and looked at him questioningly. Sawyer didn't do things like compliment people. "Oh, um, Thanks."

Sawyer looked like he could barely contain himself, his eyes were dancing. Kate knew something was up but she had no idea what. With Sawyer it could have been anything.

"Think I can talk you out of it." He said suddenly very serious.

Kate rolled her eyes but couldn't help smiling. That was more like it.

Sawyer was grinning again and Kate knew something was coming. "You know, it would look better on the floor."

"Would you stop?" Kate laughed; secretly thrilled he was in a good mood.

"Just trying to make small talk." He was obviously pleased with himself. He glanced at her out of the corner of his eyes again when he got no response. "Are you almost done?"

"Why? You have somewhere to be?" Kate stood back and then cut a bit more.

"Yeah." He yawned, looking almost like a little kid.

Kate couldn't help herself. She laughed. "I bet you were a cute kid."

Sawyer looked at her like she'd just turned purple. No one asked him about when he was a kid.

Kate knew she'd struck something, and she hoped she hadn't pushed to far; she didn't want to make him mad, not when he was happy. She shouldn't have asked about when he was a kid.

She stood back examining her work. She racked her brain for something to keep him for falling into the bad mood she could see him moving into. "Hey Sawyer." She asked biting her lip.

"Yeah?" He looked at her. 'Great.' He thought. She was going to ask him about when he was a kid. He was a little annoyed but she sure as hell looked cut biting her lip like that.

"Nice pants." She said catching Sawyer off guard.

Sawyer laughed, relieved, even a little amused, "Are you going to try to talk me out of them Freckles?"

Kate was almost glowing. It wasn't often the two of them could both be happy and laugh together. It reminded her of the time at the waterfall.

"Maybe I am." She said causing him to raise an eyebrow. "You sure do look nice with your new haircut."

"Well hell, want to see my place then?" Sawyer was actually in a good mood, which was odd for him. It was weird; there was nothing for him to worry about in this moment, no need to watch his back.

"That's alright." Kate laughed. She put the scissors in her back and laid down in the grass closing her eyes to keep the sun out. A few moments later she felt Sawyer beside her. After a minute of so of this, Kate laying with her eyes closed and Sawyer sitting and looking at her, Kate opened one eye.

"Truth or dare." She said re-closing her eyes.

Sawyer lay down beside her. "Truth."

"You've really never been in love?" Kate asked, hoping that maybe she could get something out of him, she figured now was as good a time as she would ever find. But he was silent for a while making her think she'd gone to far again.

Eventually he did answer. "When we played 'I never' I wasn't lying."

Kate was a little disappointed. His answer didn't clear anything up, but if verb tenses were to be trusted he might just be in love with her. But she didn't believe it really; she was probably just over thinking this. He wasn't in love, he wasn't sending her a secret message in his words, he was just weird

She felt Sawyer move and turned propping herself on her elbow. Opening her eyes she saw he was looking at her. He had a look in his eyes that she'd never seen before. With the simple motion of pushing his hair out of his face Kate invited him to talk.

"You really think that you will be arrested if we're rescued?"

Kate nodded. "Probably. But maybe we won't be rescued."

"Yeah maybe. There ain't anything important in the real world that we don't have here." Sawyer was lazily picking at the grass and avoiding eye contact at all costs.

Kate wanted to put her hand on his arm, hold him, just touch him, to have him reassure her that she was safe. She wanted to tell him all kinds of things. But she didn't. Instead she just laid back again.

Sawyer watched her. She was gorgeous. He could look at her for hours, she was the kind of girl men loved to watch sleep. She looked so helpless, like she needed someone to watch over her and protect her. It made him feel like she meant something in her life; he was her protector.

He wished he could protect her, he wanted to. He had never wanted to protect anyone since his mom died. He briefly wondered if his mom would have liked Kate, but as soon as the thought registered with him he pushed it out of his mind. That was just a little to sentiment and official for Sawyer.

She had fallen asleep. Her chest was slowing rising and falling methodically. He found himself mesmerized and shook his head to get back to the real world, where his thoughts turned to her again. What if they were rescued? His heart ached at the thought of her being lead away in handcuffs. Whatever she did it couldn't have been that bad, not enough to take her freedom. The thought of her confined, locked up was awful. That would kill her.

He was saving her. She was locked up and he came along taking the keys from the prison guard who had fallen asleep, just like the men he watched in his beloved western movies.

"Hurry we have to go." He whispered as he opened the cell door for her, being as quiet as possible so he didn't wake up the guard.

She ran to him and kissed him gratefully, but no, there wasn't time for that. He grabbed her hand and led her out of the building. "There's my car." He whispered as they opened the door. "We're going to be okay."

"Sawyer. Sawyer wake up." Kate was shaking him.

It was darker outside now, the sun had moved behind the mountains. He yawned.

"We fell asleep." She said as he sat up.

Sawyer pulled a piece of grass out of her hair. She smiled at him and he smiled back.


	3. Chapter 3

It didn't bother her. Nope, he could talk to whomever he wanted to, Kate told herself as she forced herself to pay attention to the clothes she was sorting. 

But why her! She'd shot Shannon after all, why wouldn't Jack talk to someone else?

No, no, it didn't matter. She didn't care. It wasn't her business.

Oops, the reds don't go with the yellows. She picked up the shirt and put it in a different pile.

It wasn't that he was talking to someone it was that he was talking to her. Kate didn't know what it was but she hated Ana Lucia. She hadn't said a word to her yet, every time she tried the image of Sayid giving that speech would come to her.

Every time she heard Ana's voice she would think of Shannon's body dead and lifeless. And when she saw Jack talking to Ana it brought up hatred deep inside of her.

Kate realized she wasn't even paying attention to the clothes anymore and gave up. She'd do it later. Ana and Jack had moved some and it appeared they were heading towards the graves.

Kate watched them, they needed to turn, turn right now. Turn! Damn it turn! But they didn't turn they kept on walking. Kate made to walk towards them.

"You a stalker now?" Sawyer asked coming up behind her.

Kate turned to him. "They're heading towards the graves. I don't like her." Kate looked at Ana and Jack again.

Sawyer wasn't even feigning interest in Kate's inability to cope with the new woman on the island. She could go where he wanted, sure it pissed him off that she killed Shannon, he cared more than people thought, but she could go where she wanted. He would have preferred her not to but he wasn't going to stop her.

"Don't you care? She killed her." Kate was looking at Sawyer angrily.

"It's not like she's going there to spit on the grave." Sawyer sat down looking at the piles of clothes Kate had started. He started changing them some haphazardly. "You ever washed clothes before in your life?"

"Come on we're going."

"We're what?" He asked looking at her. "Cause I ain't doing anything. Following the fuzz and the doctor doesn't sound like a great plan to me."

"Come on." Kate grabbed his hand and was dragging him. Sawyer smirked, looking at her hand. She must be pissed not to notice that she was holding his hand.

Suddenly the trip seemed more fun to Sawyer, flaunting physical affection in front of Jack sounded like a good idea to Sawyer, so he continued to pretend not to want to go, just to make sure she didn't let go. She had soft hands, even for out here.

They quickly came up on Jack and Ana, who were in fact at the graves.

"Imagine seeing you here." Kate said in a voice that sounded false to everyone there.

Sawyer put an arm around Kate and changed his weight so that to her it would feel like he was leaning on her, but wouldn't look that way to Jack. At least that's what he hoped it would look like.

Jack looked at Sawyer's arm with disdain. "I was showing Ana…"

Kate cut Jack off. "Showing her Shannon's grave."

She didn't know what exactly it was that made her so mad about this, except that Shannon had been nice to her, and Kate wasn't use to girls like Shannon being nice to her. Or maybe it was that Ana had hurt Sayid, whatever it was it infuriated Kate.

Ana Lucia looked at Kate coldly, sizing her up as a threat in a matter of seconds. "If I had known it was her, I wouldn't have shot."

Kate looked at Ana like one would look at a stain on a favorite shirt. "She's still dead."

"Shannon isn't the only one buried her Kate." Jack was looking at the two girls in upset interest.

"Yeah Boone too, trying to save us." Kate's eyes got wide. "Did you have a radio with you?" Something had clicked. She had moved away from Sawyer's grasp now and the two men were both looking at the girls as if some sort of miracle was happening.

"Yeah…why?" Ana's voice sounded loud and vulgar after Kate's low cold voice.

Kate's face was flushed. "Then why didn't you get our messages?"

"We're not the others. We got a message okay! I thought it was the others, I made them turn it off."

"Boone was on the radio, right before he died." Kate thought of Claire telling her Locke's story of Boone's death.

Sawyer looked interested, he hadn't known anything about Boone being on a radio, but then again no one told him anything.

Ana's eyes were about as wide as Kate's. "A little over a week ago?" She asked, her voice was just a little softer. "That's when we got it."

"And you said to turn it off!" Kate looked feral. Sawyer thought it was sexy.

"I already told you that I thought it was the others."

"You seem to be wrong a lot." Kate made a step towards Ana. "Wrong about that, wrong about Shannon. Were you even on the plane?"

"I saw her before the flight Kate." Jack moved towards the girls, as Sawyer took a step back.

Kate stopped for a second re-evaluating the situation. "I still don't trust her."

"I didn't kill her." Ana Lucia motioned towards Shannon's grave, obviously furious. "If she hadn't been running through the jungle like a madwoman then she wouldn't have got shot and I wouldn't have had to tie up the Iraqi. But instead-" Ana was cut off by Kate's fist connecting with her face.

It was Jack and Sayid who broke the fight up. Jack had tried but couldn't do it by himself and Sawyer had been no help, only standing there and catcalling. Sayid had heard the commotion and come, helping to break them up.

Sawyer sat off to the side of Kate, Sayid and Sun. They were all talking and he wasn't one for talking. Sun was putting something in a bowl on Kate's cuts.

"Why'd you do it." Sayid asked.

"She made it sound like it was Shannon's fault." Kate sighed.

"You don't want to fight her, it'll only cause trouble." Sun put the bowl down and sat.

"She saw him." Sayid said causing all three of them to look at him.

"Saw who?"

"Walt."

"She saw Walt?" Kate asked brightening up a bit. "Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"I think it was a hallucination." Sayid said. "He would disappear, when she first told me I didn't believe her, I thought she was just upset, she hadn't been getting enough sleep, but then I saw him too. When we were in the woods. He was there."

"Then he must be in the woods." Sun smiled just a bit.

"It wasn't Walt, it was like a projection of Walt. If I had just been faster, I should have grabbed her, she'd be here."

Sawyer looked away, Sayid looked as if he would cry and it wasn't something Sawyer wanted to see.

"You can't blame yourself." Sun sounded so earnest.

"But I had a chance to grab her, I should have known."

"How could you?" Kate asked.

"I knew nothing good would be in those woods, and I let her go. I told her I'd protect her, a lot of good I am. It's punishment."

Sawyer shifted uncomfortably. "This ain't punishment."

Kate almost jumped; she had forgotten that he was there.

"Then what is it?" Sayid asked.

"We're on an island."

"But we all have bad things in our past. I think it is punishment, for our sins." Sun said.

Sawyer turned to look at them all. "And who's punishing us? God? You think we've been bad enough for God to come and put us on a damn island. What about the others."

"I don't have all the answers." Sayid looked as though he wished Sawyer wasn't there.

"If anyone does have the answers it's them." Sawyer said.

"Of course it's them." Kate said. "But Walt, how is he…"

"There's a lot of mystery on the island." Sun said. "Perhaps we need to find them."

"And do what?" Sawyer couldn't believe these guys, they acted like they were superheroes. "Ask them to tell us the answer? They'll kill us."

"Isn't that what they're doing now?" Sayid asked. "Shannon's dead, she was lured by Walt, Boone's dead, Charlie almost died, they have Walt, they tried to take Claire's baby, they've taken Danielle's baby."

"That's what she says." Sawyer added. "You might not have noticed but she's got some screws loose that one."

"She knew where to take us before." Sayid seemed to have some plan.

Sawyer stood up. "Okay Power Rangers if you are planning some mission to save the boy and get us all saved I don't want nothing to do with it."

"Why are you so scared?" Sun asked surprising all of them.

"I'm not scared, I just know it isn't going to work. But fine, what do I have to loose, lets go find the crazy lady and ask her to take us to Oz."

"Do you have to be so negative?" Kate asked now that they were alone.

"It's not going to work." Sawyer stuck the clothes into the machine and hit the button, it's mechanical noise almost foreign now but comforting.

"We should at least try."

"Yeah, well I've already got shot in the arm so call me crazy but I don't want to go."

Kate sat on top of the dryer. "But you said you would."

"Yeah. I guess I'm not the smartest."

"Let's not talk about this. Chances are we won't end up going, nobody's going to want to go now."

"Why do you think I agreed? I'm just glad you're admitting it." Sawyer smiled. "But you fight good….for a girl."

Kate rolled her eyes. "Is that some kind of compliment cowboy?"

Sawyer shrugged, leaning against the wall. "So I found something the other day."

"Did you?" Kate asked pulling her feet up onto the dryer. "What's that?"

"A copy of Gone With the Wind. Down in the South it's kind of a classic, you might have heard of it."

Kate rolled her eyes. "I've heard of it. Are you asking me on a date?" She smiled.

"A date? I don't go on dates. I'm just telling you that I'm going to watch it."

"Then what are you waiting for?"

"Nothing." Sawyer turned to leave with a smirk.

Kate jumped onto his back carefully avoiding his shoulder, though he still winced.

"Sorry."

Sawyer laughed. "I think I'll survive."

Kate rested her chin on the top of his head. "I'm telling you this is a good hair cut."

Sawyer let her get off at the couch and went to get the movie. Kate went and found a blanket and sat on the couch.

"I can't believe you like this movie." She told Sawyer as he came back. "It's a chick flick."

"Rhett's my hero." Sawyer sat down beside her.

"I should have known." Kate draped the blanket over both of them.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Sawyer looked at her as he fast-forwarded through the credits. "Takes forever for the damn thing to start." He muttered.

"That you have that attitude he does, you're the southern gentleman with the bad side, and you're good at manipulating people."

"You forgot my phenomenal skill with women."

"I suppose you could call it that." Kate curled up, laying her head on the arm of the couch. "Now shut up and hit play."

"Yes ma'am." Sawyer smirked. "I'm going to be watching you though."

"For what?" Kate asked

"To take my curtains."

"Shhh." Kate said mouthing the words on the screen. "Those Wilkes always marry their cousins."


	4. Chapter 4

"What are you smiling at?" Kate asked Sun. They were working in the garden.

"You look happy." Sun told her grabbing some seeds and planting them. It had been a few days since the fight and they were still working on the plans to find the others. No one wanted them to go out alone, they'd had enough deaths, but they did agree that they needed to find the others. But first they needed a plan.

"What's not to be happy about?" Kate asked realizing that a few months ago in this situation she could have found nothing good, but now the island was home. She couldn't imagine living without these people.

"You're spending a lot of time with him." Sun packed in dirt. "I know that smile, when I met Jin…"

"I don't think you can compare mine and Sawyer's relationship to yours and Jin's."

Sun laughed. "You just seem happy, and he does too."

"Sawyer…happy?" Kate smirked and the two girls shared a laugh.

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There was some sort of commotion at the camp; Kate could hear it as she got closer. She broke into a run and she could see the people gathered around someone. Charlie looked hysterical, he was clutching Aaron tightly and the baby was crying.

"What's going on?" Kate asked running up to them. Charlie looked at her and she knew. "Where is she?" Kate asked quickly.

Jack came pushing through everyone and Kate used the opening to get closer. Claire was laying in the sand, she was bloody and unconscious. There was also someone laying beside her, someone Kate had never seen before.

"Who is that?" Kate asked. "What happened?"

Jack looked at Kate. "Go get Sun."

"Who is that?" Kate pointed to the man laying in the sand.

"It's one of them. Go get Sun!" Jack screamed at her as he picked up Claire she had been stabbed. Kate gasped. "Get her Kate!"

Kate took off running. Please let Sun still be at the garden, please. She had to be there. "SUN! SUN!" Kate made it to the garden but Sun wasn't there. "Sun! Sun! Where are you?" Kate started running again; maybe she was at the hatch. She was running barely paying attention to where she was going.

She realized she was going in the wrong direction, she didn't know where she was, the whole place looked unfamiliar. Kate screamed for help. "Sun! Sawyer!"

There was someone up ahead of her, crying. It sounded familiar. "Hello?" Kate asked heading towards the voice.

"Help me." The woman stood up and Kate stumbled. It was Shannon. "We're not dead."

"What?" Kate looked at her she must be hallucinating.

"Not dead, the island…it has secrets." Shannon was whispering.

"Shannon? What do you mean? Tell me where you are." Kate pleaded with her. "I'll help you."

"Help me." Shannon whispered and turned.

"No, don't go. Wait." Kate went to chase her but she was gone. She stood there for a second before remembering what she had to do. She ran again, some how finding her place. "Sun!"

Sun came onto the path. "Kate…what's wrong?" She asked putting a hand on her.

"They need you on the beach, Claire, she's hurt." Kate put her hands on her knees catching her breath. "Go."

Sun nodded, her eyes widening, and then she went running.

Kate stood where she was for a while. "Shannon?" She whispered into the silence. The day's events were running through her mind. "LET THEM GO!" Kate screamed into the jungle.

She heard whispers around her, they were laughing, mocking her.

"Kate?" Sawyer walked up towards her slowly as one would approach someone crazy.

"I saw her Sawyer." Kate told him.

"Saw who?"

"Shannon."

Sawyer looked at her strange. "Shannon's dead."

"I saw her! I'm not crazy."

Sawyer looked genuinely concerned and scared. "Kate you need sleep." He got closer to her and she moved away.

"I saw her. We have to save her; they're going to take us all Sawyer. All of us."

"She got shot Kate. It wasn't the others, Ana isn't an other!"

"The island, you don't understand Sawyer, I saw her, she told me! She told me she wasn't dead."

Sawyer grabbed her by the shoulders. "She's dead."

"Boone could be there too, the island, it must have made clones so we'd think they died."

Sawyer was shaking her now. "Kate, listen, they're dead. Come on."

"We have to go to the beach." She told him he started to protest but she stopped him. "Claire's there, she's hurt, we have to help. Come on."

Sawyer watched her closely. "Kate, listen…"

"Claire is hurt! I didn't imagine that!" She was screaming at him now.

"Fine, lets go." He started to walk but stopped.

"Sawyer!" Kate protested.

Sawyer put his finger to his lips. "Shh." He listened closer. "Come on." He almost growled, when she kept standing there he grabbed her pulling her closer. "I'll carry you if I have to but they're coming Kate, we have to hide."

Kate followed him without protest, running and doing her best to keep up with him.

"Here." He whispered going into an overgrown bush. Kate followed.

"Sawyer?" She whispered.

He looked at her and shook his head, to tell her not to say anything, and mouthed the word wait.

It was about thirty seconds later that they passed. Kate almost gasped but caught herself just in time. After they passed they sat in silence for about a minute. Kate was no longer in her hysterical state.

"That's them." Kate asked.

Sawyer nodded. "Come on." He made his way out of the bush and held a hand out to her helping her. "Lets go." He took off running towards the beach.

Claire was breathing shallowly and Charlie was standing over her, Eko beside him with a hand on his shoulder. The man Kate had seen earlier was tied up now and looked like he was rousing. Sun was holding Aaron and brightened up a bit to see Kate but it went away quickly when she saw the look on her face. Everyone looked scared.

Kate looked around and found him; she turned and put a hand on Sawyer's chest. "I'll be back." She headed towards Sayid.

He looked at her sadly. "Kate…"

She hugged him. "I saw her."

Sayid pulled back looking at her. "Saw who?"

"I saw Shannon, like she saw Walt, she said she wasn't dead."

Sayid shook his head. "She was shot."

Kate's heart sank, no one believed her. Maybe she was crazy after all. "I know Sayid but I saw her, I can't explain it but she was there. I don't understand it at all, I wish I did but…" She looked into his eyes pleading him. "I need you to believe me, I wouldn't tell you if I didn't think there was hope. But I'm not crazy, I saw her Sayid, when I was looking for Sun. Please believe me."

Sayid nodded. "I believe you that you saw her." The statement normally would have sounded patronizing but not from Sayid. "I don't know if you saw her, but that you think you did, I believe and I hope it was her."

Kate nodded. "What happened?" She motioned towards Claire.

"Charlie and Hurley were golfing and Claire was there, but she felt bad so she came back, and they must have been waiting in her hut. Eko was in the jungle right over there and heard her screaming, he came running and the man that the baby and Claire was chasing him. When the man saw Eko he stopped for a second and Claire grabbed him. He stabbed her and started to run but Eko got to him and got him down. When I got here Charlie and Hurley were back, and that's what I've put together from asking people."

"Is she going to be okay?" Kate asked.

"Jack said he missed any of her major organs and she should be okay. But he's worried about infection."

"I'm going to go see her." Kate looked at Sayid. "Are you okay?"

Sayid nodded. "Thank you."

Kate smiled. "And thank you." She hugged him again before heading towards Claire, but was stopped as she passed The Other. He had woken up and whispered something as she passed.

"What?" Kate turned to him, her adrenaline immediately starting to pump through her.

"There's no use fighting us." The man told her.

Kate kneeled down in front of him. "Where are they?"

The man smiled. "Who?"

Kate grabbed his face, pushing his head up against the pole he was tied to. "Where are they?"

He continued to smile in silence.

Kate let him go throwing his head back. "You're dead." She went over to Kate who had fallen back asleep. Charlie looked up at Kate. "I should have went with her."

"It's not your fault." She sat down next to him. "We're all doing our best."

"It's not good enough. We're all going to end up dead, or taken by them."

Kate sat with him in silence. "Stay with her, don't worry about the baby. I'll take care of him."

Charlie looked at her. "I'm not letting that baby out of my sight."

Kate could feel the tension between the two of them and turned. "Bye Charlie." She headed towards Sawyer but was stopped by Jack.

"Kate." He looked at her with an unreadable expression. "Are we ever going to talk?"

Kate looked down for a second gaining her composure before looking at Jack. "I don't like the way things are between us but I don't know how to fix it."

"I understand what you were going through when you kissed me Kate." Jack had that annoying empathetic look that drove Kate crazy.

Kate wanted to scream at him, to shake him and tell him that he didn't understand, but she couldn't do it. "The man who attacked Claire is awake."

"Kate…." He moved towards her.

Kate put a hand on his chest. "Jack, I can't do this right now, I can't be with you, and at the moment I can't have this talk. I'm sorry, more than you know. I wish I could be with you." She took a breath. "You're a good man Jack, a great man and that scares me because I'm not who you think I am."

"Kate, we all have skeletons in our past."

"I promise, we will talk and I'll try to explain to you, but you need someone like you…you deserve someone like you. Someone to take care of you and you can take care of them." Kate lowered her hand, fighting back tears, this day was one of the most emotionally and physically draining days she'd had in years and she was wearing thing. "You will always be important to me Jack, and thank you for everything you've done." She kissed him on his cheek and walked off quickly, she didn't to cry and she really didn't want him to see her cry.

She broke into a run down the sand and didn't stop till she was away from everyone. She wouldn't cry she told herself as she sat down leaning against a rock, she had went past a turn and couldn't see past a rock that was jutting out. She wanted to scream and pound on the ground but she didn't, she'd been through worse than this, or at least she told herself that.

_Kate was deep in thought and jumped at the sound of someone knocking on her window. She turned around and let out a sigh of bittersweet relief when she saw who it was. _

_ Kate opened the window. "Tom what are you doing here?" She asked as he climbed in, beautiful as ever. She stood back and watched, every movement he made seemed graceful and strong. Kate shook her head; she couldn't have these thoughts, not now. _

_ "You seemed so upset today." Tom stopped looking around and realizing what was happening. "Kate, you can't run away." _

_ "I can't stay here." She closed up the suitcase and sighed. "I have to get out before my mom and Wayne get home." _

_ "What are you going to do? You're too young." He was as rational as ever. _

_ "I just turned 15 I'm old enough." Kate sat on her bed. _

_ "Where you even going to tell me?" Tom asked grabbing a chair and sitting in front of her. _

_ "I was going to call you when I got to the next town." Kate bit on her fingernail nervously. _

_ "I thought we would be together forever, remember?" He was hurt and she could tell. It made her feel awful. _

_ "I would have come back." Kate took his hand and pulled him towards her so that he came and sat on the bed. She moved to the middle of the bed and sat Indian style and he did the same across from her. They had always sat like that thinking up wild plans when they were younger. _

_ "Wait Kate, I'll be able to drive in a few months and I've got a job, we'll get a car and leave. Me and you." _

_ "No, you have to go to college." Why did he have to come now? Kate thought it would have been easier without him. _

_ "I don't want to loose you." He took both her hands and held them scooting closer so that their knees were touching. _

_ "I don't want to loose you either Tom." _

_ "Kate?" _

_ "What?" Kate was doing her best not to cry but he was making it to hard. _

_ "I love you." He looked at her nervously. "I mean I'm in love with you, I've always loved you but I've fallen in love with you now." He saw smiling a bit and she noticed his jaw had squared some. _

_ "I'm in love with you two." Kate smiled laughing just a bit. _

_ He leaned forward and kissed her, they'd kissed before .Tom had been her first kiss. The first time they kissed, really kissed they were 11 and they were wrestling and he just kissed her. But this kiss was different from the rest. It was more real, more powerful. Kate had thought nothing could hurt her and then she heard the car pull up. She pulled away quickly. _

_ "They're back. It's to late." She jumped up throwing the suitcase under her bed. "Tom go." _

_ "Come with me." _

_ "I can't." _

_ "I'll steal the car and we'll go to your dad. Kate please." _

_ Kate kissed Tom again. "I can't, not right now. Leave! Go! We're not supposed to be alone together." She pushed him towards the window and he left. _

"You think it's safe sitting by yourself?" Sawyer asked sitting next to her. "You scared the hell out of Sun, she said you'd just taken off running."

"Sorry." Kate realized she was biting on her nail and put her hand down.

Sawyer shrugged. "Don't matter to me. I think we should move up to the caves."

"We?" Kate asked smiling just a little.

Sawyer looked annoyed. "Well I mean I am. I don't really care if you do or not, I just thought since…."

"Shut up." Kate cut him off and he looked at her quickly.

"Well hell…"

She did it again. "I need to tell you something."

"What?" Sawyer looked vaguely interested.

Kate seemed to loose the nerve because she didn't say anything and Sawyer sat looking at her.

"Kate?" He asked when the silence started to seem like it wouldn't break.

Kate looked at him with an expression Sawyer had seen before but it surprised him that she had it now. It amazed him how fast women could change their emotions and he raised an eyebrow. "Well if that ain't something Freckles."

"What?" Kate asked annoyed, in him and in herself, for being so readable. "What I was going to say was…"

"You weren't going to say anything." He looked so cocky and arrogant. "You might have told yourself that you were but I know you well enough to know that isn't the truth."

"You know me?" Kate asked.

"I know that you want to kiss me."

"You wish I wanted to kiss you." Kate protested.

"If you had wanted to tell me something you would have."

Kate looked at him frustrated. It drove her crazy how he could read her and it made him even angrier that he was arrogant enough to tell her how she felt. "You're so pompous! And if I do want to kiss you? Is that such a bad thing?"

"God!" Sawyer exclaimed making Kate look at him. He grabbed her kissing her deeply. Kate put an arm around his neck and tangled her fingers in his hair. But just as quickly as he had started kissing her he stopped.

Sawyer looked almost vindicated as he smiled at her silently and mockingly.

"You think that's funny don't you?" She asked annoyed. "I don't know how I stand you."

He continued smiling at her silently. It was driving her crazy and she found herself kissing him. This time she pulled away, just enough so that she could see his face.

"We're even." Sawyer said so quietly if she had been any further away she probably wouldn't have heard him. And then he was kissing her again. He kissed like Tom; it was the kind of kiss that you read about in books, the cheap romance novels. It wasn't the kind of kiss described so painstakingly in classic novels but a real kiss. One that made you want to melt. The world didn't spin or stop it just didn't matter because of the kiss, it wasn't religiously pure or soft and full of love but complete and wild. Kate had no doubt that this was the kind of kiss that awakened princesses.

She pressed her body into him as wrapped his fingers in her hair. They were putting everything into this moment, all the fear and wildness of the day. All the panic and screams it was all there, an electrical current between the two of them.

Kate pulled him down to the sand with her, she needed him, she needed to get away from it all for a while, to remove herself from the hell of the island. She wanted Sawyer not because he drove her crazy and not because he had eyes that could read her a lot better than she could read him but because they were alike and because she understood him. She understood the kind of man he was and it was the kind of man she hated and she loved him. It made no sense and all her prior experience and lessons screamed to get away from him to run and yet she found every cell in her body wanting him.

Sawyer need Kate, he needed the beautiful confusion she brought to him. Sometimes without reason he knew how she felt and he could read her and other times she was like some strange creature that he couldn't even begin to comprehend. Sawyer knew girls like Kate, the wild damaged girls but those girls weren't Kate. No she was a completely foreign object to him, he had never met anyone like her. She wasn't like the other girls he knew, she seemed like them and to an outsider there was no difference but Kate was nothing like them. He couldn't explain her complexity and he couldn't even begin to grasp it. All he knew was that he adored her. He liked to watch her, he liked the way she moved so graceful yet sure of herself, yet somehow still completely naïve. She was a terrifying paradox that he needed to survive.


	5. Chapter 5

Sawyer sat at the end of the sand on the beach, partially shaded by the trees behind him. He was watching Sayid and Jack try to get information out of the Other. He knew they would eventually torture him and couldn't help but smirk knowing that this man wouldn't get a kiss.

Sawyer put his attention back on the book he was reading, The Outsiders. Rose had found it and given it to him, she was a nice lady. Sawyer was thrilled when she had it. He loved the book and had always been able to relate to the boys.

Leaves fell onto him and he brushed them off haphazardly but stopped when he heard what sounded like a giggle coming from overhead. Looking up he saw Kate lying on a tree branch above him.

"Spying on me?" He asked.

"I was here first. I like it up." She told him swinging herself down from the tree and settling in the packed sand beside him. "People never notice when I'm up there."

"You were that annoying nosy kid weren't you?" He asked smirking. "I hated kids like you."

"And what were you? A greaser?" She took the book from him looking it over. "I've never read the book, I saw the movie once though."

Sawyer rolled his eyes. "Kids these days."

"How old _are_ you?" Kate asked.

"Old enough." Sawyer took the book back and marked his page, shutting it. "I've got things to do."

"No you don't."

Sawyer looked at her as he stood up. "Yes sweet cheeks I do."

Kate sighed annoyed herself at how easily he could be annoyed. "Fine I won't ask how old you are. But I'm 22."

Sawyer coughed. "You're lying, you are not 22."

Kate grinned a bit. "Yeah I'm 26." She stood up. "But you must be old cause that freaked you out."

"I'm not old." Sawyer protested walking off, secretly happy with the fact that she would follow him. He just needed to come up with something to do now. "Why do you care?"

Honestly Kate didn't care all that much but she'd be lying if she said she didn't get a kick out of annoying him. "45." She watched him out of the corner of her eyes, soon he'd be yelling or stomping off like a child.

"I'm not 45!" He stopped suddenly and she almost ran into him. "I'm 38 okay." He immediately regretted saying it when he saw the look of triumph on her face.

Her smiled faded and Sawyer felt his chest tighten. She was looking at something behind him dreadfully. He turned around expecting to see something awful but instead was met with Jack and Ana Lucia. They were talking and walking. Sawyer turned back around.

His movement seemed to have woken Kate up because she was now trying to cover the look of disgust on her face. "Bitch."

Sawyer wasn't stupid, it wasn't just Ana that was upsetting Kate so bad. He walked off quickly and it wasn't long before he heard her behind him.

"Sawyer! What the hell?" She was catching up to him.

Sawyer walked faster he went past Jack and Ana who looked at him questioningly. He could hear Kate's pace slow just a little when she pasted Jack and he quickened his again. He could see the caves ahead of him and he turned sharply. He didn't want to be around everyone.

"Sawyer!" He felt Kate grab his arm and he stopped turning around quickly. She looked at him in silence. She wanted to say something but it was like the words were stuck in her mouth. She parted her lips with her tongue. "Sawyer."

He looked at her fighting the urge to push her against the tree and kiss her. He could feel her grip loosen on his arm and once it dropped and she was no longer touching him he could still feel the lingering tingle of where her fingers had been.

They stayed like this for some time, or maybe it was only a few seconds. It felt like a long time to the two of them.

"Who's Wayne?" Sawyer finally asked.

Kate's expression changed and he couldn't read her at all. The only change was the almost imperceptible quickening of her breathing.

She opened her mouth slowly looking for words. "Just some guy." She said, her teeth barely parting to let sound through.

"He must have messed you up real bad." Sawyer was going for blood, the idea of her and Jack was eating at him.

"I don't want to talk about it."

"How'd you do it Kate? How did you kill him? Was it bloody?"

"I said I don't want to talk about it." Kate's fixed her eyes on him. "Unless you want to go into your past too. Why don't you tell me about the real Sawyer? At least I didn't go taking on some asshole's name and carrying around a letter."

Sawyer had gotten what he wanted but immediately regretted it. "I'm not the fugitive and you want to go into that letter?" He took off towards the caves so suddenly Kate almost jumped back. It took her a few seconds to regain her bearings but then was after him.

When she caught up to him he was going through her things. "What are you doing?" She grabbed him but he threw her off. She went to grab him again but he had stopped and pulled something out of her bag.

"Let's talk about this." He was holding up the toy plane. Kate tried to grab it but he pulled it away.

"Sawyer give me that." She put her hand out for it.

"For me it's a letter for you it's a toy plane. We're not that different Sweetheart." He was holding the plane away from him just a bit studying it.

Kate snatched the plane angrily. There weren't many other people around them but those that were had looked at them and left, finding something else to occupy their time with.

"What the hell is your problem?" Kate shoved the plane back into her bag. "You are seriously fcked up."

Sawyer knew he'd gone to far but he also knew that it was to late to go back. He was unconsciously balling the letter up in his hand.

"You aren't the only person in the world with problems Sawyer!" Kate ran her hand through her hair and leaned up against the wall.

Sawyer tilted his head to the side almost imperceptibly. "And you may not understand me as well as you think you do."

"You think that that man" Kate gestured angrily at the paper "screwed up your life so horribly. If we get back I'm going to prison because I killed the man who fucked up my life so bad!"

"We are alike I guess." Sawyer muttered.

"Yeah so alike! At least your mother died loving you!"

"Yeah I'm one lucky bastard!" Sawyer had shoved the letter back into his pocket. "It's to bad for you that your dad didn't kill your mom. So damn lucky. Don't give me that shit."

"He killed my baby!" Kate screamed.

Sawyer stopped. "What?" He was watching her now.

Kate stopped also and blanched. "Nothing." She said as if he would forget what she had said. She should have known it would come through at some point. "It's nothing."

Sawyer almost smiled. "No, it is something."

Kate turned to go but he grabbed her. "I guess even the best slip up." He pulled her close to him.

She was breathing hard and looking up at him, gathering her words. "You think you're so bad ass don't you. So disconnected."

"I'm not the one almost in tears."

"I'm not the one who fell in love."

"What?" He was still holding onto her arm and it was starting to hurt.

She pulled her arm away. "I said I didn't fall in love."

"You didn't?"

She could feel his breath. She was still standing close even though he was no longer holding onto her. He took a step closer and she took a step back. What seemed like forever passed between the two of them in silence. It was as if everything was waiting for an answer, even the animals were quiet.

"Do you think I'm stupid?" He asked taking a step towards her again so that she knocked into the wall.

"Move."

Sawyer took another step forward and he was pressed against her. Leaning down he whispered into her ear, causing her hair to move with his breath, "Do you think I'm stupid Freckles?"

Kate was scared even though she knew he wouldn't do anything to her. In fact she felt safer with him than she did with anyone. But right now something told her to be scared. Her instincts told her to push him and run as fast as she could until she was out of breath but something kept her glued to the spot. "No."

Sawyer felt compelled and magnetically drawn to her. He knew he was scaring her but he couldn't move. It was as if something had taken over him, the words sounded foreign to his ears and he was surprised when he heard them. "Do you love me?"

Without thinking Kate tried to take a step back but only pushed her back into the wall. Her whole body was aching and her mind was screaming to run and she couldn't. She willed her body forward but it made no difference she was still there, feeling his breath on her skin and his rough cheek up against hers. She could feel his heartbeat, or was that hers. She didn't know. Her mouth was dry and as she drew in breath it seemed to scrape against her throat. She realized he had grabbed her wrist at some point and was holding onto it.

She licked her lips but it didn't seem to make any difference and they still felt parched. "Sawyer."

"Answer me." He almost growled so softly she barely heard it. Maybe he didn't even say it, maybe it was her imagination.

"I can't." She moved her head down, but he grabbed her by the chin pushing it back up and she yelped as her head hit the wall. He dropped his hand when she made the noise as if burned but didn't move his body; she was pinned to the wall.

"You can." He pressed himself closer. He could feel her chest moving in and out and when their skin met her stuck to his, she was sweating. "Answer me Kate."

"I can't answer you!"

"You can!" He moved back a bit, not enough to let her move but she couldn't feel his body heat as strong anymore. She couldn't feel his heartbeat.

"No. I can't." She made to move.

He grabbed her wrists "Then it's a yes." And pushed her back causing her to stumble. "Isn't it."

They were in their own world, others had moved back into the area but were still staying clear of Kate's shelter and it wouldn't have mattered because the only thing in the world that mattered to the two of them was each other.

Kate was shaking her head. "I can't say it." She looked as if life hadn't taught her not to she would have been crying. She moved into him willingly. "I can't."

He dropped one wrist and pulled her closer by her waist. "I need to hear you say it." He heard that strange thing make him say. He felt like he would throw up any minute.

She felt the same. She was silently shaking her head now in almost unnoticeable movements.

He wanted to shake her, the thing tried to make him shake her but he stopped himself. It was an almost painful thing not doing it, but he felt relieved having control over something. But then he heard it again. "I need to hear you say it."

He could feel her trembling in his arms. If he had seen any other man treating her this way he would have killed them without thought. He would have wrung their neck. She looked so scared. Her hairline was drenched in sweat.

Her breathing was so hard he was scared she would faint any second. She leaned forward surprising him and causing him to grab her, he thought she would fall instead she whispered something into his hair that he couldn't understand.

"What?" He asked.

She moved back and looked at him scared. Had she said it? Had she told him she loved him? Instead of answering him she wordlessly sat onto the ground.

Sawyer leaned up against the wall. The thing had left him and he felt worn out. It felt like when you wrapped a rubber band around your wrist until your hand turned purple then you took the rubber band off. It was like blood was reentering him. The air suddenly felt cold like he had been sleeping with to many blankets and had taken them off, the cold air hitting him suddenly. He was physically and emotionally drained.

Tired.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Thanks for the reviews guys. I really appreciate it. :) This chapter starts off with the previous scene from Kate's POV. It's more of an extension of the last chapter than anything else but I really wanted to post the last one as soon as I wrote it. I hope you enjoy it. There isn't to much Skate in it. It's mostly backstory.**

Sawyer pulled Kate closer and dropped her wrist. He had a feral look in his eye that under any other circumstances she would have found incredibly sexy, hell it even registered somewhere in the back of her mind now.

She felt as though she would throw up, he knew about the baby. He was begging her to say it. She wanted to say it. Say three little words, three little words that had ruined her life once. But they couldn't be bad omens. She hadn't lost that baby out of love.

She wanted to tell him but every time she tried the words would stick in her throat and it was impossible to get them out. The only thing she could manage to choke out was "I can't." She wished he would believe her. Believe that she couldn't'.

She could feel his breath on her and feel his skin sticking her hers. The air seemed stale like when you pull the blanket over your head and it's too thick for air to get through.

It registered that she was shaking and she tried to control it but it didn't work. He asked her again. He was almost begging her.

"I need to hear you say it." He told her again.

Kate felt invisible strings pulling her forward; she was on her tiptoes falling into him. She could feel his hair against her face before it registered that she was nestled up against him. She tried to choke out those three simple words again, knowing full well that part of her didn't want to say it, but the raw intensity of the moment called for the words. The words she couldn't say. She died in her throat.

She could feel the air in her throat, all she needed to do was form the words and choke them out. It was that simple, it wasn't a hard task, it was something she did every day. Just form the words and make the noise.

She tried to focus on the words, on the mundane task in front of her but was continually distracted by the smell of clover in his hair. He had used the shampoo she left out for him. He smelled like her father. Again and again she focused and again and again the words died. She couldn't have been standing there for more than 2 seconds but it felt like an eternity. She had to say something. She was sure of that.

Kate focused; she'd do it this time. "Sawyer…I need you." She was so quietly that she wasn't even sure she said it. She was incredibly disappointed. She still hadn't done it.

The invisible strings let go of her suddenly and she stumbled back. She could feel her knees go weak beneath her and she sat down before she fell. Kate leaned her head back and closed her eyes; the last image she saw before her eyelids closed was Sawyer leaning up against the wall.

As she sat there she could feel her pulse slowing and her breathing was becoming more regular. She sat down replaying what had just happened in her head over and over again. When she opened her eyes again he was gone. It was a bit darker and the noise outside told her time had passed and people had come back to the area. She had a feeling she had fallen asleep. It was validated by the pain in her leg when she stood up. She had a horrible headache and went to find Sun, she didn't feel like dealing with Jack at the moment.

_"Kate Scarlett." Trent cooed as Kate packed her bag earning him a look of disdain._

_"Just because my mother is a nutcase and named me after a movie character doesn't mean I like it okay." She wasn't in the mood for him attempted lightening of the mood. _

_"Kate, Katherine, whatever you want me to call you, baby, let me go with you." _

_Kate stuffed a shirt into the suitcase. "No. For the hundredth time no. I don't even want to go but I have to tell my mom."_

_"Do it over the phone." Trent coaxed._

_"I can't. I know it seems bizarre but I just have to tell her in person." Kate stopped packing and wrapped her arms around her husband. "It's something I can share with her, and I don't have much of that. She's my mom." _

_Trent kissed the top of her head and rested his chin there. "I know that. I just want to go, I can't stand the thought of that bastard even looking at you."_

_"He shouldn't be there." Kate smiled even though he couldn't see her. "I'll be fine. Don't worry."_

_"I love you."_

_"I love you too." Kate pulled away kissing him and then going back to packing. "I think I want a girl." _

_Trent came up behind her wrapping his arms around her and resting his hands on her barely formed bump. "Like I said before, it doesn't matter to me. As long as it has your smile Katie." He kissed her neck._

_Kate giggled and pulled away. "You're going to make me late." _

_"There are always more flights." Trent reached for her and she ran to the other side of the bed, smacking his hand in the process._

_"Stop that! We were supposed to be catching a flight to see your aunt when we conceived this little surprise."_

_Trent rolled his eyes, sighing unhappily. "Fine. I can't go, I can't touch you."_

_8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888_

_"I can't believe you did this Kate!" Her mom yelled as she paced the house. _

_"Why not? You said he'd be gone and I wanted to come tell you." Kate was sitting down crying. _

_"He could come back." _

_"Don't you get it! Come with me mom, leave him." _

_Her mom stopped sitting on the edge of the couch. "I can't leave him Katherine, I love him."_

_"He beats you mom."_

_"Mind your business Katherine." _

_"It is my business! You're my mom. Come on!" Kate stood up pulling at her mom like a child. "We'll leave, me and Trent have a guest bedroom and you can stay with us. You'll find someone better than Wayne." She touched a piece of her mom's hair. "Look at this, gray hair. Come on, tonight we'll go to a hotel, an expensive one and live in luxury. You'll never see the bastard again."_

_"Bastard. I thought we raised you better." Wayne said. Kate turned suddenly, blanching to see him standing in the doorway. "That's not a nice word, maybe we should wash your mouth out."_

_He had been drinking Kate could tell immediately. "You didn't raise me." She regretted not bringing Trent along. Trent had been a star football player in high school, he would have done it in college but he broke his leg jumping off the roof of the barn with Kate. He was strong and not scared of Wayne. He wasn't scared of anything as far as Kate was concerned. _

_"So why are you here?" Wayne was heading towards her. _

_"I needed to talk to my mom." _

_"You're trying to steal her! You want to take her away you stupid bitch." Before Kate even had time to react he had slapped her in the face._

_Her mom rushed forward grabbing Wayne. "Don't." She tried to put her arms around him to calm him._

_"Don't Diana." He pushed her away and grabbed Kate. "I've had enough of you Katherine. I raised you, I put food on the table and this is my reward, you trying to take my wife away. I thought I told you never to come back." He was lifting her off the ground by her throat and she couldn't breath._

_Her mom tried again. "Wayne! Stop it." Kate was choking audibly. "Wayne! Stop it! Stop it!" To her own surprise and Kate's she hit him. He turned suddenly throwing her against the coffee table and dropped Kate. She wasn't moving but seemed to be breathing. At lease she was alive Kate thought._

_Kate tried to scramble for the door to go get help but he turned noticing her. "Kate, don't run. Please." His voice was calmer now as he made his way over to her, kneeling down as she back against the wall. _

_"I have too." Kate tried to stand up but he was over her, with his knees on her chest. "Please." Kate was ready to beg, it wasn't just her life she'd be begging for. _

_"I remember when you first starting bringing those boys into the house. Up to your room they would go. Your mom and me pretended not to notice; we did Kate. Trent must have been one special son of a b!tch."_

_"Wayne, just let me go. I won't come back."_

_"You always say that Kate." He moved his face closer to hers and she could smell the alcohol on his breath. "And you always come back. Again and again."_

_Kate had dealt with him like this before but it still scared her. "If you'd just let me go…"_

_His fist cut her off and he pushed more of his weight into her causing her to scream. Please don't hurt the baby she thought over and over. "But you always denied me Katie. Like that time I read you the three little pigs, do you remember that?"_

_"I was a little girl." Kate was crying now, tears running down her face. _

_"You're not a little girl anymore." She could feel his hand on her leg, slowly moving upwards it made her sick. "You're a woman now. A very beautiful woman."_

_"Get off me." She said between her teeth. She tried to throw him off but he was stronger than her and all it did was make him angry. _

_He slammed her back down roughly and she let out a yelp. "You won't deny me tonight Katherine." He hand was in her inner thigh._

_She screamed, it was all she knew to do, scream. As he picked her up she fought like she'd heard on those talk shows, kicking and scratching and biting. It didn't seem to faze him much; he must have been drunker than she thought. Or just evil enough to not care. AS he dropped her on the bed he made sure to let her head hit the headboard._

_Her eyes were stinging from the makeup running into them and her voice hurt from yelling. She knew it was no good; her neighbors weren't close enough to hear. But as he straddled her she continued to yell. _

_"Shut up!" He screamed at her, grabbing her by the hair. "Shut up!"_

_Kate continued to scream and tried again to push him off she almost knocked him off balance but he caught himself before she had time to get anywhere. _

_"I said shut up!" He slammed her head back. She continued to scream despite his protests until he started punching her stomach. She immediately fell silent. "Good girl." His hand snaked underneath her top. "Slamming your head didn't stop you. Why'd that?" He asked as he started removing her shirt. She looked at him unsure of how to react, she didn't want to make him more angry. She was trying to come up with a plan in her head. "Now you're quiet you little whore." He removed her bra leaving her exposed and embarrassed. "Well it doesn't matter to me." She could see his hand heading for his belt and suddenly felt as if she'd get sick. Her eyes followed his dirty fingers…_

_"What the fck are you doing?" A voice came that caused Kate to brighten even in these circumstances. _

_"Tom." She whispered._

_Wayne had spun around almost causing Kate to fall to the floor. She grabbed for her clothes redressing quickly. "Get the hell out boy." _

_"You said…you told me he never touched you." Tom looked at Kate then back at Wayne, hatred growing in his eyes. "I was driving by, saw the rental, I was hoping it was you Katie."_

_Wayne stood up his belt hanging open grossly. At this movement Tom looked around suddenly his eyes landing on a vase of flowers. He grabbed it, looking almost frightening even to Kate, with the horrific look of hatred that he had. _

_"I swear to God if you don't get out I'll kill you." He told Wayne moving in on him like a lion stalking prey. "In fact I should kill you now." He lunged at him breaking the vase on Wayne. Before he had time to swing again Wayne had taken off out of the room sloppily, almost falling. _

_"I'll get you." He told Tom as he turned around at the doorway, holding his bleeding face. _

_"Fck you." Tom threw what was left of the vase at him as Wayne turned and left. _

_Kate was sitting back on the bed, her top back on. She was crying and as Tom sat down next to her she grabbed onto him. _

_"Oh Katie. I'm so sorry. You should have told me. I'm so sorry." Tom told her, holding her close and smoothing her hair. "If I had just known."_

_"I didn't want him to hurt you." Kate looked at him and pulled back placing a hand on her stomach. "It's dead Tom. My baby's dead."_

_He blanched and his eyes got wide. "Your baby?" He asked confused but at the look of despair on her face he regained himself. "You don't know that. Sometimes babies are fine after trauma. I've seen it happen."_

_Kate shook her head. "I just know it. I know it, he killed my baby and oh Tom I'm so sorry." She grabbed onto him again crying into his white doctors coat, it already had two black marks from her mascara. "I'm so sorry for what I did to you. I just had to go."_

_"Shhh. It's okay." He rocked her gently. _

_Kate let him hold her trying to calm herself, trying to get the image of Wayne out of her head. She knew she should go check on her mom but couldn't do it, her mom had let this happen. She had known for years. Instead Kate just sat there letting Tom rock her. When she had went silent he pulled back a bit to look at her._

_Kate wiped her eyes. "Tom?" _

_"Yeah?"  
_

_"I love you." _

_Tom was silent for a few seconds looking down at his hand, which now housed a wedding band. Finally he looked back up. "I love you too." _

_Kate kissed him hungrily. It didn't matter that Trent was at home waiting for her, worrying. It didn't matter that she lost her baby. It didn't matter that Tom married one of the blond bimbos that had been trailing him all their life. No, none of it mattered. Those people, they were just people. Filler. They loved each other and everyone knew it. They had always loved each other. Kate let her hands roam all over him, feeling the still familiar curves of his body; it was like a path home. This man she would love forever. She lay back pulling him down with her. _

_One of his hands was wrapped in her hair tugging at it gently while the other explored her body, quickly moving over the bump. When his hands went under her shirt she felt relived to have the familiar fingers touching her again. _

_But suddenly he had pulled away, sitting up and rebuttoning the pants Kate had skillfully undone._

_"Whats wrong" Kate asked._

_"I'm married." Tom looked down at her sadly._

_"But we're together Tommy." Kate pulled him towards her again. _

_He ducked out of her grasp. "I'm sorry Kate. Maybe, maybe if you had come back sooner." He was standing up and reaching into his wallet. He threw some money at her. "Go home Kate."_

_"What! I don't need your money Tom!" Kate was dismayed. This had to be some sort of sick joke. She felt sick again._

There was something moving in her camp. She couldn't tell what it was in the dark and groped around for something, she wasn't sure what.

Suddenly the thing had grabbed her and covered her mouth and the thing's freshly cut hair was tickling her face. "Shh." Sawyer whispered to her. "I hear something." He slowly moved his hand.

"We're on an island with 40 other people." Kate whispered back annoyed. ""And what the hell are you doing here?"

"I was walking when I heard something. I think it's them." Sawyer whispered squinting his eyes and looking into the darkness. "There's something there."

Kate sighed and squinted too, partially annoyed by the fact that he was still holding onto her like you would a screaming child trying to run into the road. There was something there.

Then it came, the rustling and noise accompanying the shaking. Suddenly the thing was lifted off the ground and in the moonlight it was more visible. The thing clearly was a man. Kate made to move, a sudden instinct making her want to help the man. She wouldn't have run out there but it was just a move forward wanting to help.

Sawyer tightened his grip on her and pulled her back into the shadowier part of the camp with him. They could no longer see what was going on around them. The noise quickly stopped but they sat huddled for minutes breathing deeply scared.

"Do you think it's gone?" Kate finally whispered.

"I don't know." Sawyer whispered back, yawning.

"Sawyer?" Kate whispered turning her head.

"Yeah?" He asked.

"Stay here okay? Until it's light."

"Okay."


End file.
